Birds In Cages
by arian
Summary: Unintentional, yet inevitable sequel to Half Forgotten Interlude.
1. Default Chapter Title

Birds in Cages.

By Arian.

"Will the birds they put in cages

Ever ride upon the wind?

Will the children life outrages

Ever learn to love again?"

English Lyrics by Will Jennings, from Notre-Dame De Paris

Author's note: This is a sequel to Half-Forgotten Interlude, so read that first. Incidentally, I tend to call that fic the one that I shouldn't have written and now I've written a sequel. There's logic for you…

Anyway, I said in that fic that that Arian wasn't me. Well, she's still the same character but now she's sooo like me it's hard to tell where she leaves off and I begin. Confused? Don't worry about it…

This fic is very self-indulgent and I don't apologise for that. My story, I can write what I like! So there! Ahem. Sorry. 

"But dreaming is for moonrise

And moonlight ails these tired eyes."Bulimic Beats – written by Matthews/Catatonia

Arian sat on the lifter, watching the colours fly past. It had taken a while for her to get used to some of Esthar's technology but it had been worth the effort.

A couple of months had passed since she'd last been here. Timber had finally achieved independence, after much wrangling with Galbadia, and this had freed up her time. Time previously spent in Timber was now spent travelling all over the world, seeing new places and different cultures but always returning to Esthar every once in a while. That was getting to be a noticeable habit – and one that would be hard to break.

_I visit because I like to visit. _She thought forcefully. _Not because I _need_ to, just because I _want_ to._

The lifter drifted to a halt and she stepped out into the hallway, glancing up at the picture of Winhill as she walked past.

_Maybe I'll go there next. I've never been there before._

"You're back, then?" Kiros stood a short distance down the corridor. 

"Am I?" Arian looked down at herself, feigning surprise. "Why, so I am!"

"Sarcasm will get you into trouble one day."

"I can get into trouble fine without your advice!" She grinned. "Do I have permission to enter?"

"Go on in. Anything to get your unique sense of humour out of range!"

Laughing, she sauntered in the door and spread her arms wide. "And lo! She returns!" She declaimed grandly. 

Laguna smiled and shook his head faintly. "How is it that you know exactly _when_ to return? I was just starting to miss you again."

Something in Arian's mind gave a faint shiver. There was something in that comment that worried her.

"I must be psychic." She shrugged.

"Where did you go this time? You weren't gone for as long as normal."

"That's because I went to Centra and it's very dull. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but there's not really a lot to see there."

"Tell me about it." He said earnestly.

"Why? You've been there already. And it's the most boring place –"

"You _know_ why. Do we have to go through this every time I ask?"

Arian sighed. "Alright." She knew why Laguna always asked her that question. He wanted to hear about her travels because he couldn't travel himself anymore. That didn't mean he didn't _want_ to travel, but it was not something that was possible. He was too tied down here. 

"I'll tell you about it, even if it is the most mind-numbing place I've ever been to."

***************

"That's more or less all that's been going on here." Laguna finished, after a long and characteristically rambling account of what Arian had missed. "I wish I had your freedom. I'm _bored_ here!"

"Don't whinge about it." She looked up from watching her feet swing to where Laguna sat on the edge of the desk next to her. "You've more luck than any one person deserves. Besides, if you say things like that you'll tempt fate and something'll happen."

"I'm gonna die here." He warned in mock morbidity. "I'll live out the rest of my life in this building. D'ya think there's such a thing as death-by-paperwork?"

"_You'll_ never find out! You never do any!" She chuckled. 

"For one reason; if you sign something, they can wave that piece of paper at you _forever_. It took a while for me to learn that one. Odine got me to sign something that seemed harmless enough at the time, but a couple of years later it turned out I'd dug myself into a hole." Laguna caught her vacant stare and stopped. "What?"

"I like it here." She said suddenly, staring out the window. "So many colours!" Arian paused, frowning a little before she continued. "But there are no trees. I miss trees."

"Nothing grows here. Something happened to the ground in Odine's early experiments way back when Adel was still around."

"So with all this magic and technology, we still can't make things grow exactly where we want. We can't do something as simple as that." She laughed.

"Mmm. I guess." It was an unspoken rule that they didn't talk about philosophy or anything that was remotely serious and Arian was getting dangerously close to crossing that line.

"Can they see us?" She pointed curiously at the people on one of the walkways below, then tried to attract their attention by waving.

"Nah. One-way glass."

"I suppose it wouldn't be a terribly good idea. If it was truly transparent, I mean. All it would take would be a sniper in one of these other buildings –"

"Yeah. I get the idea." Laguna said, somewhat uncomfortably.

Arian just gave a slightly malicious laugh and he shot her a pointed look. "Do you always laugh at other people's discomfort?"

"Yep." She nodded happily.

"Great. Now I don't even feel special." he smiled, pushing the hair back from his face. He sat in an uncharacteristic silence for a while, then looked up again. "When are you leaving?"

"Trying to get rid of me already? I only just got here."

"No. Just wondering." Laguna said quietly.

"Probably in a week, maybe two." She conceded. "Then I'll go and find some more people to irritate with my presence." Her blue eyes sparkled in anticipation of another journey.

"You said you liked it here. Why don't you stay? You must've been to almost _everywhere_ by now." He gazed hopefully at her, but she half-turned her head away. 

"There are still places I haven't seen." Arian said simply, feeling slightly awkward. Laguna had asked her that question with increasing frequency and she was still trying to ignore what she knew he wanted to say. Perhaps if she ignored it, it would go away.

She caught a movement out of the corner of her eye and she felt a kiss brush her cheek. Her eyes widened and she turned back. _This is such a bad idea. _

"That's a little out of character for you." she joked weakly, trying to gloss over what he'd done.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't say something like that unless you are. And you're not, are you?" Arian closed her eyes and sighed softly to herself. She was actually going to have to deal with this now – She had hoped she wouldn't have to. "You _should_ be sorry, though." She continued seriously. "That was a very unfair thing to do. You _know_ my… circumstances. He might be dead, but I love him."

"I hadn't forgotten. Something as loony as that is hard to forget." Laguna smiled but Arian frowned.

"Stop mucking around, I'm trying to be serious here and it's not easy. If you hadn't forgotten then why did you?" She pressed.

"You're mean." he accused, surprising her. "You damn well know why, don't you? _And_ you know I've been trying to say something for ages. Are you still gonna make me say it?"

"No." She shook her head. "But this simply isn't going to work. I'm not giving him up after everything that I've been through to defend my decision. I can't."

"But that's why it'd work so well!" Laguna paused while Arian gave him her best And-you-think-_I'm_-mad look. "Yes, I know it sounds stupid, but… Look, you're not the only one missing someone. Just maybe this'd be okay. I can't explain it, but do you understand…?" His voice trailed off and Arian stood, lost in thought.

_Maybe he's right… It might just work. There's a peculiar logic to it, we're both so lonely. Without _them_. And it wouldn't be any sort of betrayal._ She thought, remembering what she had told Laguna long ago, that the only betrayal could be to love another, and nothing else was important. _Damn! But I _do_ love him, don't I? How the hell did that happen? That was _not_ part of the plan!_ "Traitor…" She whispered, directing the remark at herself.

"Arian?"

"I'm just thinking. Hang on a moment." For one irrational moment, she was angry at Laguna, not for the interruption, but because despite everything she had been through, she had never once betrayed her Gwydion and now she had. And it was all his fault.

Then another thought struck her, one that managed to shake her insane belief system to it's roots. _I don't think he'd actually mind. Gwydion isn't as petty as that. Why _should_ he mind? Why should it matter? _Arian laughed out loud, startling the wits out of Laguna.

"Alright." She nodded. "We'll give it a try." She held out her hands and he took them hesitantly. Arian was more intelligent than him, he knew, but he also knew that however normal she sometimes appeared, she was one sandwich short of a picnic. Sanity was not something she was overly familiar with, but that didn't bother him. Too much.

"I'll still wander for a while." She cautioned. "But perhaps I won't stay away quite so long."

"I can live with that. At least you can still tell me what's going on in the world." He was interrupted as Kiros and Ward walked in. 

Ward smiled, noticing a slight change in the demeanour of the pair, and he indicated something to Kiros.

"Yeah, I think you're right. At least it means we've won that bet."

"What bet?" Laguna asked, curiously.

"Me and Ward bet the secretary that you and… Well, it doesn't matter. Looks like we've won, anyhow. Could we talk for a while?" Kiros asked, suddenly quite serious.

"You don't want me around, right?" Arian asked, hearing the tone of Kiros' voice. "I'll go and sit quietly in my room, like a good girl." She said mockingly, starting to walk to the room she always stayed in.

"Hang on, I'll have to come with you." Laguna told her.

"I know where it is. Some of us actually _have_ a sense of direction." She retorted.

"Yeah, but I've changed it."

"_What_? I _liked_ that room! What did you go and change it for?" Arian said angrily.

"I found one you'll like better, I promise. I'll be back in a sec, Kiros." Laguna quickly shoved the indignant Arian out the door before his friend had a chance to object.

"It'd better be a nice room." She threatened. "Or I'll just move back into the other one and barricade myself in."

"That's a bit extreme, isn't it? It's only a room, after all." Laguna shrugged as they walked down the corridor.

Arian stopped for a moment. "_Only_ a room? I _adored_ that room!" She stalked after him, muttering under her breath.

"Here I am, trying to do something nice for you, and all you do is moan. This is it." He stood to one side of the door with a smug I-know-something-you-don't sort of grin on his face, waiting for her to open it.

Batting her hair back from her face, she shot him a sceptical look and opened the door.

"Oh my!" She breathed, standing frozen in the doorway as her eyes scanned the room. Decorated in the blue and silver colours that dominated Esthar, the room was otherwise out of place compared to the rest of the city. Whereas Esthar tended towards an elegant simplicity, this room was extravagant, to say the least.

Taking Arian's shoulders, Laguna pushed her in the doorway, enjoying her reaction immensely.

"This is… disgustingly opulent, you know that?" She managed eventually, shaking her head slightly, her blue eyes still wide with amazement. "I love it."

"Thought you might."

"Two." Arian said suddenly, enigmatically.

Laguna stared up at the ceiling, confused. "Did I miss something?" He wondered out loud.

"I said earlier I'd be here for a week, maybe two. It's definitely two now and I might extend it to three. This is a _very_ nice room." She walked around, running her hands over surfaces, until she reached the large window set in the far wall. Seeing a small balcony outside, her eyes lit up. "It opens?"

"Yeah. I'll show you."

"I can do it myself." She answered, a little defensively. Laguna stopped where he was and shrugged. After a minute of watching her search the window for a means of opening it, he saw her shoulders sag slightly.

"Help?" She asked in a small voice.

Walking to the side of the window, he pushed a button embedded in the wall and the window slid silently to one side.

"Show off." She smiled, stepping outside.

Laguna didn't follow but hovered in the doorway. "I've gotta go talk to Kiros, before – "

"He has kittens." Arian cut in, laughing.

"Once you find a joke you like, you never let it drop, do you?"

She shook her head in reply and turned to the view of the city that lay out in front of her.

"Whaddya think he wants? He sounded serious." Laguna continued.

Arian snickered a little and turned to face him. "You can't guess? You are _such_ a moron sometimes."

"Ah, but you love me anyway, don't you?" He grinned.

"Perhaps." She conceded, irritated at being asked such a question and spinning back to look at the city to conceal it.

"Perhaps is not an answer." he smirked, leaning in the doorway.

"Yes, then." She sighed in exasperation. "Now scoot. No – wait." She added, just as he turned to go. "Whose room is… was this? It's too nice just to be _a_ room. It must have been intended for someone. Who?"

"It's no-one's." He said quickly. Too quickly.

Arian gave him a searching look, but let the subject drop for now. "Whereabouts am I? I lost track of where we were walking on the way here." She asked, walking with him back across the room to the door.

"That room down there is Elle's." Laguna told her, pointing down the corridor. "Those two across the way are Ward's and Kiros'. And that one up there is mine."

"Convenient." She said blandly, keeping her face blank.

"Isn't it, though?" he answered in the exact same neutral tone of voice. "If you walk that way, you'll get back to the office eventually."

"Alright. I think I can manage. Go talk to Kiros." She watched him walk away, then turned and shut the door, walking back out to her balcony.

She folded her arms on the railing and rested her head there, her hair spilling out over the side, like an out of place Rapunzel, lost in such a modern environment. Feeling something change in the air around her, she looked up. The presence was back.

Whether it was truly there, or whether it was one of the by-products of her undoubtable insanity, she didn't know. She believed it to be real, but at the same time she knew that she could be delusional about some things. Believing usually made her happy though, and she was unwillingly to accept how alone she'd be if the presence wasn't there. Sometimes, it just made her feel even more alone, but thankfully this wasn't one of those times.

"So you're back then. What do you think, Gwydion?" She spoke out loud to what she perceived to be a shade. "Do you object? I don't think that you do. It makes me happy. How can you be opposed to that? But… if you are… forgive me. Because I'm going to carry on with this now, and hope that you can be glad for me. But I wish you were here. More than ever. But you can't be, so forgive me for being lonely and needing someone who _can_ be."

She sighed. Always she hoped for an answer, and always there was silence. 

She continued to stand there, even after she felt the change in the air that signified the departure of her silent ghost. She stood, leaning on the balcony, watching the sunset.

***************

"So you and her are a pair now?" Kiros asked.

"I suppose you could say that. Is this what you wanted to talk about?" Laguna flopped into a chair opposite his friend. "But it's bizarre. It's more like… I dunno, an agreement? An arrangement than anything else."

"So you two are both weird. What's new?" Kiros said absently. "But we just need to work out where _we_ stand on this." 

Ward gestured something and Kiros spoke it out loud. "You're still married. What about Raine?"

"I know what he said." Laguna fidgeted, feeling awkward. "I haven't forgotten her. I never do. But… everyone has to let go, sooner or later. And…"

"Enough, already." Kiros held up a hand to stop him. "We don't need to hear all your sentimental drivel. We just wanted to make sure you knew what you were doing, and I think that you do." He paused before continuing in a softer tone of voice. "Is she still insane?"

"She's not insane. She's crazy. There's a difference. And yes, she is. But have you noticed how much she's changed? It's like she's a kid again, or something."

"And? You behave like that too."

"But that's different! She used to be… so bitter and sad, and now…"

"…" 

Kiros looked at Ward and nodded. "I think he's right. She's being like this now because she _can_. She had to grow up too quickly but now she can be the kid that she never had the chance to be before." He looked back at Ward. "That's really very astute."

Laguna thought for a while, then nodded. "You could be right." His green eyes suddenly widened and he groaned. "What about Squall? I don't think he's gonna –"

"Don't tell Squall. Not yet." Kiros said firmly. 

"But –"

"It's none of his business, Laguna. He has no right to tell you what you can and can't do. If you really want him to know, then choose a time when he's in a good mood and Rinoa's there to keep him under control. But for now, I suggest you say nothing. This has potentially serious political repercussions as it is."

"What do you mean?"

"Her history isn't exactly pretty. It may cause problems, but we'll deal with that when it happens." Kiros paused and looked at Ward for confirmation. "We'll be here no matter what happens and no matter what you decide. We always have been."

"Thanks." Laguna said surprised, but grateful.

"Have you told Arian what room that is yet?" Kiros grinned suddenly.

"Nope. And I don't intend to. I don't know _what_ she'll do when she finds out."

"Don't you mean _if_ she finds out?" 

"No, definitely _when_!" Laguna laughed.

***************

Laguna opened the door to his room, baffled that he hadn't been able to find Arian anywhere. The room was darkened, making the open window look luminous. He smiled, seeing a figure out there. 

Turning, Arian squinted into the blackness. "You're back then. Did Kiros have anything nice to say about me?"

"Like he's going to be nasty to you!" He snickered, stepping outside. "What are you doing here?"

"Your balcony is bigger than mine. And you can see the sea." She explained, pointing to a silvery glimmer on the horizon. She fell silent, watching the light of the crescent moon dance on the buildings and walkways below. 

"Dance with me?" he asked suddenly on a whim, and Arian smiled, but shook her head.

"No." She said forlornly. "Dancing under the moon is for young couples whose dreams have not been shattered. It's for people living fairytale lives, not people like me. I don't like moonlight. It… distorts. It shows us a glimpse of a dream, but withholds it. I'm not comfortable with moonlight at all."

Arian walked slowly back through the doorway and the tension that flowed out of her as she stepped out of the moon's light was almost visible. 

"You still have dreams. What about seeing the world?" Laguna followed her back inside and closed the window.

"They're not the same." She whispered sadly.

***************

"Laguna, shift yourself." Arian muttered, realising as she did so that he was asleep and therefore wouldn't hear a word she was saying. She had just woken up and found herself perched on the edge of the bed, about to fall off. Trying to shove Laguna back aways, she lost her balance and the room pirouetted in front of her eyes as she fell.

"Hmph." She sighed heavily in exasperation, dressing herself, and mumbling uncomplimentary things about men in general.

"Are you leaving?" Laguna had woken up and his voice sounded a little panicky.

"If you mean "Am I going on a journey?" the answer is no. But I am going back to my own room."

"Why?" He blinked at her, still trying to clear the sleep from his eyes.

"Because I won't get pushed out of bed." She smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow – today in fact." She corrected herself, walking to the door.

"Kiss?" he asked in a truly pitiful sounding voice.

She scrutinised him for a moment, then shook her head. "You've got that butter-wouldn't-melt expression on your face. I don't trust you when you look like that." She turned to go, but gave up and walked back to him.

Leaning down, she kissed him and then found she couldn't fully stand upright.

"Ok, Laguna, not funny. Let me go. And stop laughing at me." She added, seeing suppressed mirth in his eyes.

"Laugh at you? I wouldn't dare." He sniggered quietly and Arian found the world spinning for the second time in an hour. She yelped in surprise as he flipped her over besides him, but she quickly recovered and slid away. "Nuh-uh, I'm not staying here so you can shove me out of bed again. And stop laughing!" Arian walked to the door. "And people say _I've_ got a mean sense of humour." She muttered darkly. 

"Don't leave. I'll sulk."

"So sulk. See if I care." She retorted.

"Fine then. Go." Laguna said, trying to keep his voice serious and failing miserably.

"I will then. So there!" She laughed quietly, closing the door behind her. 

Arian started, seeing a pale wraith-like form drifting up the corridor. As the figure got closer, she relaxed. It was Ellone.

"It's a bit late – sorry, early - to be wandering the corridors, isn't it?"

"I couldn't sleep." Ellone smiled. "You here for good?"

"Well, yes. And no. Sort of." Arian frowned. "I'm around, shall we say?"

Ellone's face brightened. She liked this strange woman who visited from time to time and despite being some ten years her junior, Elle got on well with her. Arian never acted her age, in so far as that was possible.

On impulse, Elle threw her arms around a very bemused Arian. "Thank you. You make him happy."

"Jeez, Elle." She laughed awkwardly. "He's always happy. In fact, he's so optimistic it's sickening." She spoke loudly enough to be heard on the other side of the door and grinned when she heard a snigger. "But he's supposed to be sulking at the moment."

Another door opened and Kiros looked out at Arian and Elle, very disgruntled.

"Look, whatever you and him do at this time of night is up to you. But will you please be quiet?" he asked Arian, wearily. 

"Sorry." She said contritely, trying to keep a straight face. Kiros disappeared and Arian opened her mouth to speak to Ellone again, but Elle held up a hand. Arian waited, and sure enough another door opened. It was Ward this time. 

"Sorry, Ward." She apologised again and the bulky man shut the door. 

Arian winked at Ellone as she cracked open Laguna's door and peered inside.

"That's all your fault!" She hissed, then shut the door again, leaving Laguna baffled as to just _what_ he'd done.

Dragging her tired feet down the corridor, she waved back to the girl.

"Sorry, Elle, but I don't share your insomnia. I've _got_ to get some sleep. 'Night."


	2. Default Chapter Title

Birds In Cages – Part 2

By Arian

"So basically, instead of _one_ person sat doing nothing, there are now _two_ of you doing nothing." Kiros surmised, a few days later.

Arian turned her head to where Laguna was lounging next to her. "What do you think? _Are_ we doing nothing?"

Laguna stared thoughtfully at the ceiling for a moment. "Yeah. I'm an expert at doing nothing and this is definitely it."

Arian turned back to Kiros and nodded solemnly. "Yes, we _are_ doing nothing." She grinned wickedly. "Laguna can't do nothing by himself. He needed my help."

"Needed help?" Kiros asked flatly. "Laguna, do you _really_ need help to do nothing?"

"Absolutely." He said seriously.

"Well, I wish I could join you two "doing nothing" but some of us have work to do. You know how it is, other people's countries to run…"

"If you want me to give you a hand, I will. Just say." Laguna told his friend.

"Yeah." Arian said with an evil laugh. "We'd _help_ if you want, Kiros."

Kiros paled considerably at the thought of Laguna and Arian in complete control of the worlds most powerful, most technologically advanced country. "No, it's Ok."

Laguna and Arian just looked at each other and grinned, like two children with the keys to the ice-cream parlour.

"You're both as bad as each other." Kiros lamented, leaving before they decided to try and "help" him.

***************

Arian walked slowly, contemplating a journey. She had been in Esthar for about a month and she desperately wanted to wander again. _Just one more day,_ She told herself,_ then I'll leave._

Another thought passed through her head and she laughed out loud. _Yes, that'd be amusing._ Her evil sense of humour kicked in and she chuckled to herself all the way to the meeting room, where she knew Laguna, Kiros and Ward would be.

Pausing before she entered, she composed her face into a suitably serious manner and fought back all traces of amusement.

"Laguna, I need to talk to you. It's important." She said quickly, as she walked in.

"What? What's the matter?" He asked, sounding concerned.

_Damn, I'm good!_ She laughed silently and carefully positioned herself so that she could see all three of them. "I think… I'm pregnant." _Don't laugh! Don't spoil it now!_

The absolutely stunned lookon Laguna's face was just _too_ funny though and when she saw the horrified expressions of Ward and Kiros she started to snigger. The snigger quickly turned into full hysterical laughter as her legs folded underneath her and she collapsed on the floor in fits of giggles.

Kiros breathed a sigh of relief, realising that this was Arian's idea of a joke. He glanced at Ward. They had both been thinking the same thing._ Poor kid, what chance does it have with _that_ sort of genetic background?_

Arian finally managed to stop the laughter and sat up, pushing her blond hair back over her shoulders. She looked up to where Laguna was still frozen in shock.

"Joke." She said quietly. "Just joking."

"Don't _ever_ joke about that again. I don't think I can stand it." Laguna appeared to come back to life.

"'Kay." she climbed to her feet, amiably. "But the looks on your faces… Oh, that was _divine_!" She snickered, then stopped, remembering the original reason she had come here. "I'll be going sometime soon."

"How soon is "soon"?" Laguna asked.

"Couple of days, I guess. I haven't really decided." Arian started for the door but Laguna caught her arm.

"You wouldn't leave without telling me, would you?"

She flinched away from his gaze, turning back to the door.

"Course not." She replied, glibly.

***************

Arian awoke the next day and the world called. She slid out of bed and, throwing on some clothes, looked out of the window. The sun was rising, but it was not in her field of vision. All she could see was the last light-blue patch of night as it was driven away, beneath the horizon.

Opening the window, she stepped outside, glancing back once to make sure Laguna was still sleeping.

It was already warm and, despite the faint breeze that tugged at her hair and clothes, she knew it was going to be a sweltering day. Summer in Esthar could be unbearable and today was not going to be an exception.

She watched a group of seagulls wheeling inland from the coast, gliding on the air currents and calling to each other. They seemed to glow in the first hints of sunshine, as did everything caught in its path.

Arian stretched her arms up longingly to the birds as they swooped past her. Yes, this was unquestionably the day she was going to leave.

Inside, Laguna had woken and regarded her curiously. Where Arian was stood, the sun could not touch her and she looked dark and shadowy against the bright city. He watched as she stretched her arms out to the seagulls, the sun and perhaps the world in general and a sad expression crossed his face. A bird without wings, that was what she was. Or perhaps a bird whose wings had been broken, a long time ago. She had been damaged somehow, before he'd ever met her, and there was nothing that could change that.

Realising that she was probably preparing to leave, he sighed quietly. He could ask her to stay, and perhaps she would, but she would be staying because he wanted it, not because she didn't want to leave. It would be like caging a bird and expecting it to sing happily when you wanted to hear its voice, despite the fact that it never wanted to be in the cage in the first place. He couldn't do that to her.

Not really wanting to see her go, and perhaps a little curious about what she'd do, Laguna closed his eyes, feigning sleep to the best of his ability.

Arian walked back in, closing the window behind her. She looked at the apparently sleeping figure and sighed quietly to herself. She didn't want to risk waking him. If he woke, he'd drag this out and she hated that. For a while, she just watched, contemplating walking out the door now, without saying her goodbyes. Then she changed her mind, and decided to risk tempting fate.

Laguna heard her move and sit beside him and, keeping his eyes closed, he hoped a little that she wasn't leaving, after all. Her hand skimmed lightly across his face and over his hair.

"I kinda wish I could take you with me." She said with a low chuckle.

_I wish it were possible. But I'm stuck here, so you go. See the world for both of us._

He opened his eyes just in time to see her walk out, without so much as a glance back.

***************

Arian nipped into her room, threw a few items into a bag, then walked hurriedly away. She hoped to be out of Esthar before Laguna woke and found her gone, not realising he already knew.

"Kiros!" She called, seeing him walking a short way ahead of her. He gave her a quizzical look, but waited for her to catch up.

"I'm going away for a while." She explained.

"Would you be terribly disappointed if me and Ward threw a party to celebrate?" He grinned.

"You go ahead." She said with an amused look. "I don't know when I'll be back." Arian continued in a more serious tone. "Could you do something for me? Just tell Laguna that I'm sorry. Tell him that I'm a coward and I should've said goodbye properly."

***************

"Put that down, you'll break it." Kiros said for what seemed the umpteenth time in an hour.

Laguna gave him a reproachful look, but put the object back on the table and drifted aimlessly around the room for a while before flopping down in a chair.

"Will you stop throwing yourself around like that?" Kiros rolled his eyes, feeling, not for the first time, like he was dealing with a five year old.

"I'm _bored_!" Laguna whined. "When d'ya think she'll get back?"

"Soon, I hope. I don't know how much longer I can put up with you like this. To be honest though, I think you'll be waiting at _least_ another week."

"That _long?_" 

"Oh for crying out loud, she's only been gone a few days!" Kiros sighed. "You weren't like this before when wandered off." He accused.

"That was different." Laguna told his friend loftily, then he caught Kiros' "Yeah whatever" look. "It _was_!" he protested, then sighed again. "I'm bored."

"Ahhh, did Laguna lose his favourite toy?" Kiros said, in a babying tone, smiling at the dirty look he received for the comment.

"…"

Kiros laughed out loud, while Laguna twisted in his seat, trying to see Ward's face.

"What did he say? Kiros? _What?_"

"He says maybe we should take you round some of the playgroups to see if we can find you a new playmate."

"Not funny." Laguna frowned, just making Kiros laugh louder. 

After a few minutes Laguna broke the silence again.

"Kiros, I'm _bored_."

"I swear if you say that one more time I'm gonna throttle you."

***************

After two weeks of wandering, Arian drifted to a halt, not far from Balamb. She had seen everything she wanted to see, and now the wanderlust had simply vanished.

She looked at the raindrops perched along the branches of the trees and bushes, like birds poised to fly. These tiny, crystal birds did not fly though, and they sang only once as they smashed into the ground.

Tearing herself away from her contemplation of raindrops, Arian started back for Esthar, secretly knowing that she probably wouldn't leave again. Travelling didn't seem to hold quite the attraction it had before, and although she hadn't seen _everything_ the world had to offer, she had seen all she wanted to see.

***************

"Hmm, no one around." She commented to herself, looking up and down the corridors. Deciding they'd probably be in the office, Arian sauntered up to the door and flung it wide open.

"Behold! Your beloved has returned and all is well with the world!" She announced to a somewhat startled Laguna. A little of the colour drained from his face and she noticed a slightly horrified look in his eyes.

"Well don't look _too_ pleased to see me." She retorted, then stopped, seeing a figure in her peripheral vision. A figure that looked even more shocked than Laguna.

"Squall…" She breathed, instantly recognizing the face of SeeD's commander. "Oh _crap!_" She spun out of the door, pulling it closed behind her and leaning against it for support.

"Problem?" Kiros inquired, materialising beside her. 

"_Why_ weren't you here earlier? You could've told me Squall was around!"

Kiros groaned. "Let me guess. You marched in and did the whole triumphant return thing, as usual."

Arian nodded mutely, still mortified at the thought.

"And you just left Laguna to explain to Squall…? I don't think _that_ was a good idea."

Her eyes widened considerably and she swore softly to herself, tripping over her feet in her rush to get back into the room.

"Who was that?" Arian was just in time to hear Squall ask, in a deceptively calm voice.

"Um." Laguna tried to phrase some sort of answer and was relieved to see Arian and Kiros appear. He gave them an imploring look.

Arian stepped over and took his hand. She inhaled deeply and shut her eyes for a second. "This is how things are, Squall. Deal with it."

"Ok, that could've been put better." Kiros commented.

"You…" Squall began, not able to form the words, a horrified frown on his face. "I don't believe this!"

"We're not going to get anywhere like this." Kiros sighed. "Squall, come with me."

Squall glared at Kiros, angry at him for interfering. 

"You can yell at them later." Kiros gestured to the door and Squall reluctantly stalked out.

"I suggest you two get some answers planned between you. I've bought you this much time, so do something useful with it. I'm going to tell Squall about Arian's history and such, don't worry about that. Don't say I never do anything nice for you." Kiros continued.

"Do you think that's a good idea? I mean, about…"

"He's 17 years old, Laguna. If he can't deal with the truth by now, then there's no hope."

Kiros told his friend bluntly, before walking out.

"Sorry." Arian apologised with a rueful smile. "I guess I kinda put my foot in my mouth there."

"Don't worry about it. It probably would've happened sooner or later." Laguna paused. "You're back, then?"

Arian gave him a flat look. "That is _such_ a dumb thing to say. I mean, I'm standing here, aren't I?"

"So you are." He smiled, looping his arms about her waist.

She rested her head on his shoulder with a low chuckle. "I don't think I'll be going anywhere again. Not for a long while."

"Why? I don't mind, well, not too much. I think Kiros does, though…"

"What?" Arian's forehead crinkled in confusion.

"Apparently I get quite irritating sometimes. So, why?"

"I just don't feel like travelling anymore. I'm happy to stay here, for now."

"Oh, that'll be _nice._" Laguna snickered.

"Won't it just?"

There was a long silence, then she spun away and threw herself into a chair. "So what are we going to do about Squall?"

"I was trying to forget about that." Laguna said with a pained expression. "I think all we can do is tell the truth, whatever he asks. It's a bit late to make up a story and he'd never buy it anyway. All that aside, I'm the world's worst liar."

Arian nodded agreement, then stood and flitted aimless around the room for a while.

"What's up?"

"Edgy." She confessed, drifting back over to him. "I don't like being pushed into confrontations like this."

"Well relax. Everything'll work out fine in the end. It might take a while, but it'll work out."

"That's a happy outlook." She said sourly.

"You're just a pessimist." he accused. "Can you stop fidgeting like that? You're making _me_ nervous. It's alright for you. You don't get leg cramp when you're nervous." He grumbled.

"Ahhh!" She cooed, in mock sympathy.

"It's not funny." Laguna told her flatly.

"Actually, it is. It's damn near hysterical, but my sense of humour has always been questionable." She paused, a mischievous smile spreading slowly across her face. "I think I know a cure, you know."

"Yeah?" His hopeful air faded abruptly. "Hang on – What are you going to do? You have that look on your face again."

"Who? Me?" She laughed. "You'll just have to trust me. You _do_ trust me, don't you?" Her arms snaked up around his neck, pulling his head down a little. She smiled at his slightly wary expression, kissed him for a few moments, then leaned back.

"Did it work?" Arian asked.

"Not sure. We'll have to try again." Laguna grinned back.

A couple of minutes later, they were interrupted by a cough from the direction of the door. Spinning around, they saw an amused looking Kiros and Ward, and a _very_ unimpressed Squall.

"What do you think you're doing?" Squall marched up to them, sounding angry.

"Trying to find a cure for leg cramp." Arian answered instantly in a bright tone, and instantly regretted it when Squall's face grew even more flinty. "Oh, _Damn!_ I've just put my foot in it again, haven't I? Look, I'll just shut my mouth now."

"Is there a problem?" Laguna asked Squall.

Kiros put is hand over his eyes. _They're both as bad as each other! You moron, Laguna! "Is there a problem?" Squall's going to explode in a minute!_

"_Problem?!?_ Yes, there's a damned problem!" Squall yelled uncharacteristically. "What about Raine? What about my _mother?_"

"She's dead." Laguna said quietly, in a flat monotone. Admitting that always hurt a little too much. "I've had a long time to get used to the idea. And we both know what we're doing. _We_ understand this even if it seems like a strange idea to you."

"I can't believe you can just turn your back on her like this! You _left_ her! Did you care at all? Or were you just waiting for the first opportunity that –"

"Squall, just listen for a second, will you? I never turned my back on her. Things just… happened this way. It hurts you now because you have only just found Raine and she can't be around."

"Was it her?" Squall gestured to the silent Arian, apparently not hearing a word Laguna was saying. "What did she do? What did she say that made you forget my mother?"

"Laguna, tell him to stop." Arian said quietly, shaking angrily. "You're not the only one without your other half. He has no right to –"

"Oh, yes. Kiros told me about that." Squall cut in, scornfully. "I don't believe a word of it. I think you're completely insane." He spat.

Laguna's eyes widened and he grabbed at Arian's arm before she could get near to Squall. "Of all the words you could have chosen, you had to say that one." He lamented.

"_Insane_? Let me go, I'll make him pay for calling me that! I swear I will!" She yelled, murder in her eyes.

"Arian, how would you make him pay? The same way you made your brother pay? That wouldn't work. He just chose the wrong word. Let it go." Laguna told her calmly and she seemed to relax a little.

Squall had simply stood his ground and blinked at her, not anticipating such a reaction. "Come to your senses and just throw her out, Laguna. Whether you dragged her out of the gutter or she climbed out herself, I don't care, but I don't want to see her here again." 

"And since when do you get any input into who lives in Esthar's presidential residence?" Kiros put in, starting to get angry at Squall.

"What's the matter, Squall? What are you afraid of?" Arian taunted, but Squall ignored her and answered Kiros.

"Well, if we're talking about Esthar now –" 

"We're _not._" Laguna yelled above the cacophony. "Will you all just be quiet?"

Kiros and Squall stopped and looked at Laguna. Arian didn't. "No. I want an answer. Why are you so afraid of me, Squall? What do you think I'm gonna do?" She continued relentlessly.

"Arian." Laguna gave her a reproachful look and she turned away, sullenly. 

"Alright. I'll stop."

"That's not all I wanted to ask you." Laguna continued, apologetically. She tilted her head on one side, quizzically. "Would you mind… if I talked to Squall without you here? Would you be angry?"

"No, go ahead." She sighed. "I'm going. I only seem to be making things worse, anyway."

Squall smiled a cold triumphant smile as Laguna watched her leave. 

"What does Esthar think of this?" He asked his father, suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"Do they even _know_ about her? What do you think their reaction will be when they find out who she is? _What _she is, more to the point. For goodness sake, Laguna, she's only a –"

"Watch it." Laguna warned quickly. "That was a long time ago."

Squall sighed. "But what do _they_ think?" He gestured to the city that almost seemed to shine outside the window. "Will they be so willingly to let that go? Damn it, we need this country to stay stable! If there was war over this, the carnage would be horrific."

"There won't be. If they want me to, I'll just abdicate. Never wanted the job in the first place."

"You can't abdicate, that's kings. Presidents step down." Kiros commented, apparently unsurprised by Laguna's sudden declaration.

"Well I'll do that then."

"That's doesn't help. Another president doesn't necessarily create stability. It could be just as bad." Squall had apparently calmed down now, and was looking at the situation more logically. 

"Squall, whatever happens, happens. I'll deal with it then. Until then, you can't offer me any advice. But by all means, stay for a few days, if you want."

Squall stalked out at that polite dismissal and found an aide to tell him where Arian was. He wanted to talk to her before Laguna got the chance. 

***************

Arian wandered restlessly around her room, unable to relax. She was waiting for Laguna to tell her just _what_ he'd said to Squall. Maybe he hadn't wanted her there, but she'd find out what had happened. 

Drifting aimlessly, her thoughts wandered. The mysterious presence that visited her from time to time had reappeared for a while, and that had a soothing effect, but she was still anxious.

Interrupted by a knock at the door, she stopped, curious. Laguna never knocked. It was an irritating habit, but she figured since he owned the place she wouldn't moan about it. Too much.

Pulling open the door, she was shocked to see Squall stood there, a determined look on his face. Without saying a word, she waved him inside and closed the door.

Sitting down, she paused, wondering where the hell Laguna had got to.

"What?" She asked curtly, still unforgiving about the insanity remark. It was the only comment that was guaranteed to reach down inside her and flip all the switches. It was the only thing that could make her absolutely livid and it worked every time.

"I want you to leave." Squall said without hesitation.

"No. I don't think I want to do that. There's nothing _you_ can do that'll make me." She was surprised he'd asked so quickly, so forthright. 

"Don't you want to hear why?" 

Arian laughed scornfully. "I _know_ why! You're frightened I'll change him. Make him forget you and Elle and Raine. You're frightened about a lot of things, but mostly I think you're scared I'll take her place. You think I could do that? I'm almost flattered. That's beyond mortal ability, to take Raine's place and I don't want to." Her voice softened. "He has her set up high on a crystal tower in his mind that no one will ever come close to. He's practically elevated her to sainthood."

Squall blinked at her, stunned a little by the insight, by something that would never have occurred to him. He sat down opposite her, forced to rethink his strategy.

"Do you know what we talked about? After you left?"

Arian leaned forwards, anxious to hear. "No. Tell me."

"We talked about Esthar. Do you know how important this place is in terms of global powers? The technology alone… War isn't ever a pretty thing, but if Esthar became involved in one, the consequences would be grave indeed. Stability is needed here. It's very important." Squall watched her carefully, his grey eyes monitoring her movements, her reactions. He wasn't good at gauging people's feelings but he hoped he had judged her thoughts correctly.

"I don't need a politics lesson. I'm not stupid." She retorted, nervous at being studied.

"You endanger the stability here. If Esthar disapproves, which is very likely, there will be war. If Laguna steps down, like he's threatening to do, then a new president would be elected and it's possible that would cause war."

"Slow down. What did you say? Laguna stepping down?" Her eyes were wide and she swore to herself. "No. I won't let him do that. I'll speak to him. That won't happen."

"You think you could talk him out of it? He seemed to have his mind made up." Squall said casually.

"No. He is _not_ throwing this away. Not for me. Raine died alone while he was tied down here because they wanted him to be president. I will not let her have died in that manner for nothing." Arian stood and started pacing agitatedly around the room again.

"You can't talk him out of it. Whatever you do here you are going to cause a lot of fighting and a lot of people are going to die." Squall tried to keep the smug sound from his voice, knowing that he had already won. "Go away from here. Would you really want people to die, just so that you can live here in luxury for a while? If what Kiros has told me _is _true, then he isn't even the one love you cannot live without." He continued to toy with her already hideously mangled mind until she fell to the floor, sitting bewildered in a crumpled heap.

"Alright. Alright, I'll go. But not just for the reasons you've given me. There are other factors at play here. But, yes, I'll go. You arrange it. Arrange a place and transport to get me there." She acquiesced, shivering slightly.

"It's already done. I'll take you there myself." Squall sounded almost friendly in his relief.

"When?" She asked apprehensively.

"Now." She heard the answer she dreaded and shivered a little more. 

"So be it." Arian wearily climbed to her feet and sat at a small table, beginning to write a note. 

"Don't tell him where you're going." Squall cautioned. 

"I don't _know_ where I'm going. You haven't told me yet." A little of her sarcasm returned to her and she concentrated all her efforts on the white sheet in front of her. _I don't know what to write. Goodbyes are not my style, neither are notes. I can't say where I'll be, even if I knew. He'd find me and then all this would be for nothing. I can't even say _why_ I'm going because it's beyond words._ She cried softly to herself and Squall turned his back, trying to ignore her. Teardrops fell onto the paper smudging the few words she had written. "He'll look for me. This won't work. He'll look for me and he'll find me."

Squall spun back towards her and was disturbed to see how small she looked, shivering as if it were winter, eyes imploringly wide and blood drawn where she had bit her lip.

"He won't. Not if he has to chose."

Arian stared at Squall and the bubble burst. Chose between them? Squall was the last vestige of Raine left in this world and she knew there was no contest, nor would there ever be.

Everything had broken down around her so suddenly that she felt dazed. She dried her eyes, still crying on the inside for the loss of the only stability she had ever known. A stability that now threatened everyone else's stability and so must be given up. But she had other reasons, other motivations for this sudden action.

Arian picked up a few items and shoved them into a bag, while Squall looked around the room, unable to resist one last dig at her. 

"Laguna's got a lot of nerve, letting you stay in here." He said maliciously. "You don't belong in this room."

"What do you mean?" She asked, confused.

"You don't know?" Squall found his comment backfiring on him. "This is the First Lady's room. No one has stayed in here since before Adel took over."

Arian's jaw dropped and she stared around the room in disbelief. "He never told me… He wouldn't. How _dare_ he not tell me _that_?" Tears came to her eyes again, but she blinked them back. Squall had thought to hurt her with his first remark, she knew. A cold smile crept across her face. Two could play at that game. "But, you know, maybe it doesn't matter that much. It's not like I actually spend… spent a lot of time in here, anyway."

Squall caught her point, and gestured to the door, looking revolted. "The Ragnarok's waiting at the Airstation."

"At least I get to go in style." She smiled quietly.


	3. Default Chapter Title

Birds In Cages – Part 3

By Arian

Squall walked through to the office the next morning, tired at having flown all night to get Arian to her new home and then get back again before his absence had been noted. He walked slowly, with an unfamiliar feeling of curiosity at what he'd find. 

As he reached the door, he was stopped by one of the palace aides.

"I'm sorry, Commander Leonhart. I've been told not to let anyone in. Would you mind waiting for a few minutes?"

"That can't mean me." Squall asserted, feeling strange at being refused entry.

"If you wait in the room down the hall for a while, I'll let the president know you're here." The man said politely and Squall stalked off down the corridor.

***************

"She's… gone." Laguna looked up from the note dazed, unable to fully absorb the information. 

"She's wandered off again? So soon?" Kiros asked from where he stood leaning against the wall of the office.

"No. Just gone. She never leaves a note. She doesn't like saying goodbye…" Laguna's voice trailed off miserably. "This is different. She's not coming back. It's the only thing that'd be important enough to make her write this."

He handed the note over to Ward, who read it and passed it on to Kiros.

"It's very… vague." Kiros said at last, carefully. He looked down at the tearstained paper and read it aloud. "_I wish it could've worked, but dreams have never come true for me. Why should they start doing so now? Yet somehow you've made another notion come true. I can't ask more than that. I'm sorry. I love you. Goodbye._"

"…" Ward shook his head and Kiros looked thoughtfully back to the letter.

"Yeah." He agreed. "Very melodramatic, very Arian. That's exactly what I was thinking."

"Why did she leave Kiros? I thought everything was going Ok. What happened?" Laguna looked up at his friend, hurt and confused.

"You know her better than I do." Kiros shrugged, a sad expression on his face. "If you don't know, then perhaps it was just her own insanity that told her this was a good idea." His expression changed as another thought occurred. "Or perhaps…"

The same thought occurred to Laguna and the unhappiness vanished from his face to be replaced by surprise. "Squall. I can't believe he would, but it must be Squall. He's the only one who could've…" Laguna's eyes grew a little colder and when he spoke again his voice was just as cold. "Where is he?" 

Ward shrugged and Kiros leaned outside the door for a moment to speak to the aide. Closing the door carefully, he looked back to his friend, trying to gauge his reactions. Laguna angry was a rare occurrence and Kiros wasn't sure just how _safe_ it was to be Squall at this moment in time, especially not a Squall who was sat just metres down the corridor.

"Laguna, what're you going to do when you see Squall?" Kiros asked slowly.

Laguna took a deep breath. "First I'm going to ask where Arian is, then I'm going to ask what the hell he thought he was doing, _then_ I'm going to _tell_ him – "

"Fine." Kiros gave Ward a questioning look, one that Laguna missed, and Ward nodded. 

_He doesn't seem intent on actually causing Squall harm. Good. He'd really regret that later. Besides, I'm not sure who'd come off worse from that fight…He is still rational, at least. _Kiros decided to give away Squall's whereabouts and hoped he wouldn't regret it.

"Squall's down the hall. Waiting to see you, actually."

Laguna nodded, just once, and walked silently out. Kiros wisely decided not to follow unless he heard screaming from either party. 

***************

"Where is she?" Laguna asked immediately on sighting Squall. "What have you done with her? Where did you take her?"

Squall blinked, slightly amazed. He didn't think he'd _ever_ see Laguna angry. "I can't tell you that."

"Can't or _won't_?" 

"Won't." Squall glared straight back at his father. "I'm not telling you, not now, or ever. Besides, she left of her own free will. I didn't force her to." 

Laguna closed his eyes, trying not to scream at Squall. Trying desperately to keep some kind of control and rationality. "What do you think you're playing at Squall? What do you think you're doing?" He asked finally in a dangerously quiet voice. 

"Arian was a danger to the stability – "

"Don't give me that. It was nothing to do with that. It never was, was it? This isn't about what is good or bad for Esthar, it's about _you_. You didn't like her and you wanted her out. Everything else was just an excuse." 

"No. That's not so." Squall protested, but they both knew Laguna was right. 

"Right now, I want you to leave. You are the last person I want to see. In fact, I'm not sure if I even want to see you again. I'm _trying_ not to hate you for this, but I don't know if I can so much as look at you again." Laguna turned away in disgust and left Squall stood in the corridor. 

"So that's it? You'd just turn your back on me? For _her_?" Squall said incredulously. 

"No." Laguna looked back at his son. "I never would've made a choice. I shouldn't have had to. But if a choice has to be made and it's between Arian, who may be mad but is at least loyal to her insanities, or you, who having decided that he wasn't particularly keen on the idea of having a father once he'd found me, now decides to tell me who I should keep company with, I'm afraid the choice is her. Don't come back for a long time, Squall."

Squall stood silent in shock, grey eyes widened, then they narrowed. "You know what it feels like now. You know what it feels like to be left, just like you left Raine." Squall spat, angry. "Arian was lying, anyway. It was too easy to get her to leave. She didn't love you. She _never_ loved you." 

"You know something? At this point in time, I wish that you'd never been born. At least then…" Laguna walked away, not finishing the sentence. He didn't need to. Squall knew what he was going to say. _At least then Raine would still be alive._ That _hurt_ Squall and sent him reeling. He didn't realise that Laguna had the ability to hurt him so. He didn't know that the other man's opinion was so important to him, but somehow it was and now Squall trailed away down the corridor. Trailing back to Garden, and Rinoa, where he was sure of his position, where he could hurt in peace. _I wish that you'd never been born._ Squall shivered, despite the heat of Esthar's summer.

***************

"I can't believe how moronic your son is, Laguna." Kiros laughed out loud, pointing to a computer read out.

They had been in the control room of the Airstation for only a short while, looking for something that might give them an idea where Squall had hidden Arian. 

"What do you mean? Have you found her?" Laguna asked hopefully.

"Squall must've had other things on his mind when he came up with _this_ idea. Did it not occur to him that this _is_ a working airstation and not just a glorified parking spot for his convenience? Flight paths do _have_ to be monitored. Just because _he_ doesn't need to worry about crashing because that damned plane is so ostentatious that everyone sees it coming 

and – "

"Where is she?" Laguna cut in, anxiously.

"Shumi Village." Kiros waved his hand absently at a map hung on the wall. "The all-time stupidest place he could've taken her, since the Shumis seem to like you, for some reason."

"Squall isn't stupid." Laguna said quietly in his son's defence. "He can't have been thinking straight. Or maybe it just didn't occur to him that we'd actually try to find her." 

Ward gestured something and Laguna nodded. "Yeah. It could be that too."

"Are you going to stand talking all day, or are we going to get Arian?" 

"Alright, Kiros, don't have kittens." Laguna smiled, using Arian's usual joke, being as she wasn't there to say it herself. "Anyone'd think that you actually _missed_ her or something." 

"Only because she keeps you quiet and out of my way. Although a bag of sweets or something would probably work just as well…" Kiros grumbled, good-naturedly.

***************

Arian sat hunched over on a stool in the workshop. The shumi tribe left her alone, most of the time. They looked after her and made sure she had anything that she wanted, but they kept their distance. They were friendly, but slightly wary of this strange, slight woman.

She could leave, if she wanted. It wasn't necessary for her to stay _here_, just for her to stay away from Esthar. Arian didn't want to leave though. She'd only just got here, and she wanted to see if… No. That was just hoping for too much, wasn't it? He wouldn't come and find her. Squall was right. Why should he bother? Even if he did, she couldn't go back with him.

She sank a little lower, her shoulders hunching up behind her. She didn't want to look up. That wretched statue was there. It hurt her to look at it, but still she came and sat in here, regardless.

She heard familiar voices outside and heard the door open, heard the sound of footsteps, but she didn't turn around.

"Go home, Laguna." She said wearily.

Laguna, relieved at having found her, just stood and stared. What had happened to do this to her? Not even when he'd first seen her, some twenty years ago, had she looked so utterly dejected. Despite everything that had happened to her, she had always stood straight-backed and just a little proud. He recalled the girl who'd thrown the coin back at him, all because of pride, and he cursed Squall under his breath. "What did he say to do this to you?" He asked, crossing the room.

Arian didn't answer but stared ahead blankly.

Ignoring her dismissal, and forgetting for now the question he'd asked, Laguna pulled her up off the stool and twisted her to face him. "Why did you go?" He asked but still received no reply. He shook her gently, but his voice was angry. "Don't you ever, _ever_ do that again! I don't care what anyone tells you, _I'm_ the only one who has the right to tell you to leave. Not Squall, not anyone else. Wander if you have to. Travel, but always come home. Promise me you'll always come home."

"What am I? A homing pigeon?" She said unable to stop the usual sarcasm. She still couldn't look at him, though. Not until he lifted her face between his hands and forced her to look up into his green eyes. "I can't. I can't go back with you. It's nice that you've made this effort to find me, but you have to leave now. Dreams have a nasty tendency to melt when they hit reality." Arian whispered, still hoping that he could just leave and forget he'd ever found her. 

Laguna studied her face carefully and sighed. All that had been done to give her back some trust in life and show her that it was still possible for her to be happy in spite of everything, had been washed away. "No. You are not going to sit here, feeling sorry for yourself. This isn't the way things have to be. I don't know what reasons you have, and I don't particularly care right now. You are going home with us, end of conversation."

"I have _good_ reasons! You don't understand…" Arian's voice trailed off miserably and her eyes fell back to the floor. 

Laguna lifted her head back up from where it had dropped to contemplate the floor and kissed her into insensibility. "You _are_ coming home. We can argue about this now or later, but you'll come back with us in the end." He said frankly.

Arian's face broke into a suddenly smile and something seemed to click in her mind. "Later. We'll argue later. And I can tell you why and –" Her voice broke off as he hugged her, pleased at her sudden change of heart. "It'd be really useful if I could breathe." She commented and tried to twist around to speak to Ward and Kiros, who were amiably watching events from near the door. "I think it's entirely possibly that he's ever so slightly missed me." She laughed.

Laguna breathed a sigh of relief. She could still laugh. As long as she could still laugh and she was still being sarcastic, then Squall probably hadn't seriously damaged her mental state anymore than it already was. 

No longer worried with the possibility of having to drag a potentially deranged Arian back to Esthar, Laguna noticed the statue for the first time. "They built a _statue_?" He asked incredulously, staring at the centrepiece of the workshop. 

"Mmm. They really seem to like you here." Arian considered that for a moment. "We should stop by and visit the attendant before we leave. He'd want to talk to you before we go."

"That little guy? Yeah, I remember him. I'll speak to him." Laguna paused and looked back before they left. "Does my nose _really_ look like that?"

***************

Laguna approached the Elder's hut, the moomba squealing in glee as he passed, and he looked questioningly back at Kiros and Ward.

"No. We'll wait out here. You can't make _too_ much of a prat out of yourself just speaking to the Shumis and I'm sure they won't mind, if you do."

Arian's hand slipped out of his own and she leaned against the wall next to the door.

"You're not coming in either?"

She shook her head. "I don't need to, do I?"

"No, but I think you should." Laguna frowned slightly.

"You _can_ let me out of your sight. I'm not going anywhere. Besides, Kiros and Ward are here to keep an eye on me." She folded her arms, looking amused and Laguna shot her a searching look, but entered without her.

"It's funny, you know." Kiros commented after a few moments of silence. "We thought _he_ was the passive one in this irregular relationship of yours, but he's not, is he? _You're_ the submissive one."

Arian looked startled at the sudden character assessment. "Yes. You're right, but why did you think…" Her voice trailed into nothing, dazed.

"You flit around the world, coming and going at will, disappearing and reappearing as the mood takes you. It seemed like you rather liked the idea of this affiliation but you didn't seem to _need_ it. On the other hand, Laguna gets unbearable when you wander off. He becomes the most irritating individual to ever have existed and he was definitely _very_ upset when he thought you'd left for good." Kiros shook his head and Ward gestured something. "Yeah, alright, I was getting to that. It seems we were wrong." Kiros continued. "You gave in pretty easily back there." He gestured to the distant workshop. "You argued but you acquiesced so quickly. Laguna says jump and you jump."

"Did you think it could be any different? Yes, I wander, but I always came back, even when I didn't have to. Why do you think that was? He just doesn't tend to apply any pressure. He doesn't _use_ any of the authority he has. Maybe he doesn't realise it's there." Arian shrugged, feeling a little uncomfortable at being dissected. She didn't like it when people saw her character for what it was. That was what the sarcasm was there for, to stop that from happening.

"Oh, he knows it's there alright. He knows." Kiros nodded to himself, remembering the scene in the workshop. "Yeah, he knows."

Laguna reappeared and the conversation came to a stand still. "Talking about me?" He asked amiably. 

"Would we do that?" Kiros laughed, starting up the path.

Laguna looked across at Arian and she tilted her head to one side inquisitively. "What? I'm still here, see? I didn't suddenly run off, or anything."

"Home?" He asked simply.

"Yeah, Ok. Home."

***************

"Look at this!" Arian exclaimed, disgusted. "Will you just _look_ at it?" She was sat in front of a mirror, brushing her hair. With one hand she lifted a portion of her long hair and gazed at its reflection, disapproval written all over her face.

"What?" Laguna moved to stand behind her, watching in bewilderment. 

"Knot." She said simply, trying to brush it out. "An enormous knot. Ow. Some of us don't have hair that magically falls into place when we wake up and we have to actually _make_ it look presentable." She paused. "Incidentally, this is your fault." She looked up at his reflection. 

"_My_ fault? How did you work that one out?" He may have been babying her outrageously for the last few days, but he wasn't going to start letting her blame him for random events.

"It just is." Arian smiled, concentrating on the knot again.

Laguna shook his head slightly and decided to let that one pass, after all. He lifted her fair hair back over her shoulders, all but the one section she was brushing, still trying to get rid of the knot. 

"I think… if you had left, _really_ left… that I would've missed your hair." He mused, running his fingers through it.

"Missed my hair, he says! So if I'd cut you a few strands and _then_ left, you wouldn't have gone looking for me? You would've been happy with that, would you?" She laughed. "And stop doing that. I just brushed it. Muss it and I will _not_ be amused."

"You never told me why. You said that you would. You told me what Squall said, but I don't think that was enough on it's own to make you leave. Why did you?" Laguna looked at the mirror image, waiting for an answer.

"Because." Arian stopped brushing and looked thoughtfully at her own reflection. "Because it seemed like the right thing to do. Because it seemed to be a solution. Because it seemed like a good idea at the time. Because perhaps I was curious if you really _would_ look for me. Perhaps I wanted to see what lengths you'd go to. I don't really know the answer myself."

That answer frightened him. If she didn't know why, she might do the same thing again. Laguna knelt next to her chair and wrapped his arms round her waist. "Promise you won't do that again. Promise me. I thought you… You really scared me. Promise you won't do that again." _I thought it was going to be like losing Raine again. I thought I'd have to stay here, knowing you were out there someplace, but never being able to find you again._

Arian blinked, he had frightened _her_ now and her fingers toyed absently with his hair, so dark compared to her own. She nodded faintly, trying to find her voice. In the end, she slipped to the floor to sit next to him. "I won't leave. I won't go anywhere. Not like that. I didn't _want_ to go. I never _wanted_ to. I'll never leave. I promise. I will always, _always_ return." Hearing the words somewhere in the distance, but knowing they were her own, she was frightened again. _Always is a long time. Always scares me. _She found herself trembling slightly. _Always… Such a very long time. I've never been so tied down to anything before. I'm frightened, but I'll live with it._

Laguna opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by a yell from the hallway.

"Visitors!" Kiros shouted through the door and Laguna climbed to his feet, pulling Arian up with him. 

"Let's see who it is."

***************

Squall was unhappy. Having returned to Garden, Rinoa had questioned him mercilessly about what had happened and then yelled at him for a considerable period of time. When his eardrums had recovered, the SeeD commander had found himself sleeping on the floor, being as they didn't have a couch. Rinoa had been pointedly ignoring him until he agreed to come back here and apologise. He hated admitting he was wrong. He hated Laguna for saying he wished Squall had never been born and for hurting him like that. He hated Arian for existing. And now he had to apologise.

"You went and found her." Squall observed in his usual monotone, as Arian and Laguna walked in.

Laguna nodded and Rinoa stepped forwards to fill the silence. 

"Squall has something to say." She announced and glanced meaningfully back to the sullen SeeD who mumbled something under his breath. "Louder. So they can hear you." Squall scowled at her.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have interfered so much." Squall was unfortunately unable to leave it there though. "But I still don't like her. And I still think my answer was best."

"Fair enough." Laguna nodded amiably, and Arian stared at him in disbelief.

"That's it? He said all those things about me and took me away and that's all you're going to say to him?"

"What's the point saying anything else? You're back now." Laguna turned back to Squall, leaving Arian more than a little irritated. "I'm sorry about what I said to you. It's not something a person can really take back but I wish I could. I was just _so_ mad at you. How could you think I'd _leave_ Raine like that? For good? It was never meant to be that way. It wasn't deliberate. And then saying all that other stuff… I'm sorry I said what I said. But what made you come back? You're usually so stubborn I thought it'd be months before you showed up here again."

Rinoa grinned smugly. "He doesn't like sleeping on the floor. I think it gives him back ache, which is odd, because it's supposed to be _good_ for your back."

Squall rolled his eyes. _Thank you, Rinoa. Anything else you'd like to share with them, while _

_you're at it?_

"That works quite well." Arian snickered quietly. "But I'll tell you something that works even better…" She whispered something to Rinoa and the girl giggled. 

"_Really?_" 

"Yep." Arian grinned at the apprehensive looks from Laguna and Squall.

"Do you know what she said?" Squall asked, watching Rinoa warily.

"I was hoping you'd have an idea, actually." Laguna confessed. "I think the best thing for you to do is not to irritate Rinoa again. Not unless you get _really_ curious."

Squall raised an eyebrow at that remark. "I'll remember not to ask for your advice again. Telling me what I already know isn't helpful."

***************

"Trees." Arian announced enigmatically as she entered the room.

Rinoa and Squall looked up from where they were sat at a table, talking.

"What?" Squall asked, thinking it was possible that Arian had finally completely flipped. He was beginning to regret Rinoa's idea that they should stay for a few days.

Laguna walked over from the window he had been stood at and shook his head. "Nice idea, but it won't work."

Arian ignored him and made to sit down but he pulled her away.

"No. You are _not_ going to sit opposite Squall." Laguna pointed to another chair, in a sudden burst of common sense. "You are not going to sit and aggravate each other."

Glaring at him, Arian sat in another chair and Laguna nodded, contented, sitting next to her.

As she spread a sheet of paper out on the table, flattening it with her hands, Kiros and Ward wandered over, curious.

"Trees." She said again, pointing down at the paper. "I want to grow trees here."

Rinoa scrunched up her face, twisting her head from side to side, trying to see what was on the paper. "What is it?"

Squall leaned over, grey eyes scanning the paper, expressionless.

"It's a badly drawn plan of Esthar."

Arian eyes flared at the insult and she opened her mouth to fire something nasty back but Rinoa cut in. 

"He says things like that to everyone. Just ignore him."

Still not convinced, Arian started to speak again, but was once more interrupted, this time by Laguna.

"D'you really _have_ to make things so difficult for me?"

At that question, she huffed and folded her arms, still glaring at Squall but refraining from making a comment.

"So what's this about trees?" Rinoa asked quickly and Arian allowed herself to be distracted from trying to out-stare Squall, which was probably a near impossible task, anyway.

"I've drawn a map of places where we could put trees, spaces around Esthar where there is enough room for them to grow. See, along this bit here, there's lots of room." She pointed to one spot on the map.

"Nuh-uh. There isn't that much space there." Laguna commented. "The walkway doesn't go like that, you've drawn it wrong."

"I have _not_!" Arian exclaimed indignantly.

"Yeah, you have. Pen?" he asked and she passed a pen over, grumbling to herself. Laguna scribbled on the paper, then leaned back, Arian and Rinoa both peering to see what he'd drawn. Squall, uninterested by the great tree debate, leaned back in his chair, eyes on Rinoa's face, as they often were these days.

"Ohhh! That's _so_ not right! It does _not_ look like _that_! I know my drawing wasn't perfect, but this is way off the mark."

"So having established that _neither_ of you can draw, what do you plan to do now? We're on a salt lake here. Nothing'll grow." Kiros observed, amused at the bickering.

"I'll come up with something. Just let me talk to a few people." Arian promised Kiros, then looked to Laguna. "Whaddya think? Can I?"

Laguna glanced up at Kiros and Ward but they just shrugged. "Your country, Laguna. It's up to you."

"You mean you're _actually_ letting me make a decision for myself?"

"Stop with the sarcasm, it doesn't suit you. You've been spending too much time with her." Kiros waved his hand at Arian, who smiled sweetly back at him.

"You're not planning on planting a jungle or anything?" Laguna asked and Arian shook her head. "Weeell… I guess you can then, if you can make 'em grow."

"Thank you!" Arian laughed delightedly, throwing her arms around his neck.

Squall gave the pair a disapproving look. He had his own dark suspicions about the attraction Arian seemed to hold for his contrary father, and vice versa, but he kept his thoughts to himself, mainly because he knew Rinoa would _not_ be happy if he said anything.

Catching Squall's expression and hoping to provoke him, Arian covered Laguna's cheek with kisses and was very disappointed when Squall kept his temper in check and didn't throw a hissy fit.

"Are they always like this?" Squall looked up at Kiros.

"Do you mean the childish bickering or the being sickeningly slushy over each other?" Kiros asked, laughing.

"Both."

"Yes, on both counts. They're _always_ like this." Kiros breathed a long-suffering sigh and rolled his eyes. Squall's face was filled with a rare and sudden sympathy for the two and he looked from Kiros to Ward and then back again. "I feel _so_ sorry for you. I really do."

"Oh be quiet, Squall. I think it's sweet." Rinoa cooed happily. "Look, aren't they sweet?"

"Sweet?" Arian asked flatly. "Laguna, are we sweet?"

"I think _you're_ sweet."

"I think… I'm going to be violently sick." Squall muttered. 

Arian just smiled and Rinoa looked accusingly at Squall. "_You_ never say nice things about _me_!"

Squall floundered for a moment, wishing that Irvine was around to help him out. "Rinoa, I'm not good with words…" An idea struck him. "But I don't know any that could do you justice, anyway…" He hazarded.

"Well, that'll do… for a start." Rinoa sighed.

"C'mon." Arian leapt out of her chair and started for the door, gesturing for Laguna to follow.

"What? Where are we going?"

"To see a man about a tree."

"But it's tipping it down out there." He complained.

"You won't melt."

The banter could still be heard for a time after they left the room, the sounds echoing down the corridors, and Squall shook his head in disbelief.

"Are they _ever_ going to grow up?"

Kiros had moved to the window, watching for something and Squall walked over to see what had caught the man's attention.

On one of the walkways, not far away, Squall saw his father walking, already half-soaked from the downpour. A short distance in front of him, Arian spun gleefully in the rain, face upturned as the droplets ran down her cheeks, her hair darkened by the water. She turned and said something and Laguna laughed.

"Children." Kiros muttered, mild disapproval in his voice, but Squall turned and saw that he was smiling.

Ward gestured something to Kiros and the man grimaced. "I know. And if they're ill after this, they're not going to get _my_ sympathy."

Squall watched the scene outside and then spoke to the dark man besides him. "She always this chirpy?"

"Chirpy?" Kiros asked, amazed. "Arian is _not_ chirpy."

"Looks chirpy to me."

"No. She's… kind of hard to explain. Spend more time around her before you make judgements like that. She has a much darker side to her, and I think she's so excessively happy to keep that side in check. It frightens her, I think." Kiros mused. "Laguna would know about that better than me, but I don't know if he'd have the sense to recognise it or explain it. They balance each other out quite well. His optimism balances out the more depressive side of her nature."

Hearing soft footfalls behind him, Squall turned and was greeted with the sight of Ellone, who had wandered in.

"Sis! What do you think of this?" His face took on a softer, almost childlike appearance, as it often did around Elle.

"What do I think about what?" She asked curiously, not understanding what Squall was talking about.

"Squall wants your opinion of Arian." Rinoa filled in the gaps, something she had grown used to doing in any conversation featuring Squall. She knew he wasn't good at expressing himself, so she translated to avoid misunderstandings. 

"I like her. Why is it so important?" Ellone looked back at Squall.

"It's not important, Elle. Squall is just being awkward and thinks this could signify the end of the world, that's all." Rinoa grinned.

"It's not that." Squall muttered.

Rinoa watched as he mulled over all that Kiros and Elle had said and smiled. "Admit it, Squall. They suit each other."

"I think… considering their behaviour… that they damn near _deserve_ each other." He said sourly, giving in.

Ward had been watching the startled reactions of people outside as they passed by Arian and Laguna and he communicated something to Kiros. Kiros gave him a long look, then nodded gravely.

"We should've thought of that. Still, it would've happened sooner or later. Squall, would you do us a favour? Just stay here for a few more days. We might need you on hand." Kiros looked back out of the window at some of the expressions on the faces of the people of Esthar. "Stick around for a while, Squall. This could get interesting."


	4. Default Chapter Title

Birds In Cages – Part 4

By Arian

"Rise and shine!"

"You have _got_ to be kidding." Arian muttered groggily, wincing as sunlight flooded the room and made her eyes hurt.

"Time to get up." Laguna insisted again, drifting around the room.

Arian scowled. "Any other day, _I'm_ up first and the one day that I don't want to get up, you are _not_ going to make me. I'm staying right here." She curled up and pulled the sheets over her head, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the warm yellow glow from the window.

"You can't stay there all day." He pointed out, pulling the covers back from her face.

"Watch me." She glared up at him. "Why do I have to get up just 'cause you are? Any other morning you _never_ get up."

"You have to get up because it's morning and, traditionally, that's the time of day people get up." Laguna snickered.

She watched him for a time, unimpressed by his side of the argument, but unable to think of an answer. "I really hate you, sometimes." She sat up, hunching herself into a ball and pulling

the covers around her, appearing quite peculiar with just her head clear of the sheets.

Looking at her curled up like that, Laguna burst out laughing. "Do you have any idea how funny you look?"

"Well, yeah, I do _now_." She said sourly. "But I'm still staying right here."

"You don't really hate me." he commented, remembering an earlier part of the conversation and sitting next to her, still smiling.

"I do." She muttered.

"I don't think you do." He snickered, amused.

"You think you're _so_ funny, don't you? Well, you're not." Arian grumbled childishly, knowing that she was losing this argument and hating it.

He leaned over and kissed her and she kissed back instinctively, temporarily putting the argument on hold, which was just as well being as she was losing. She wished that Laguna didn't win quite so many arguments lately. _One day I'll turn the tables on him, and I'll win. _She thought. _One day… but not today. I'm having a little too much fun right now to spoil it by winning an argument._ Finding that she had cheered up considerably, she was content to let herself fall backwards with him.

"I thought you said you hated me." Laguna commented innocently.

"I think I've changed my mind." She pulled his head down towards hers, but was interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Laguna? You in there?" Kiros' voice drifted through.

Laguna's shoulders sagged a little and he rolled his eyes. "Kiros, your timing is impeccable." He called out, wryly.

"What's that supposed to –" Kiros stopped suddenly. "Oh _no_. I did _not_ want to know that. Tell me that comment didn't mean what I think it meant. Ugh. I _didn't_ need to know that!"

"What did you want?"

"You should probably come and see. It's important." Kiros sounded serious.

"This'd better be good." Laguna sighed, irritated, and climbed to his feet. "You should show up too, if it's important." He told Arian as she resumed trying to ignore the daylight. "And that means you'll have to get up."

"Yeah, alright." She grumbled as he left.

"Where's Arian?" Kiros asked as Laguna pulled the door shut.

"Hopefully she's getting dressed."

Kiros stopped walking and favoured Laguna with a flat look.

"Whaaat?"

"Lots of words spring to mind to describe you two. Right now, insatiable is the word I'm going to start with. The list gets considerably less polite from there on. Do you _really_ want me to continue?"

Laguna gave his friend a strange look. "Well now, what else is there for us to–" 

"No. Stop there. I just do _not_ want to know." Kiros carried on walking, throwing his hands up in the air and muttering to himself.

***************

"You could've _told_ me what room you'd be in. I had to ask around to find you." Arian became aware of the still atmosphere and looked around at the grave faces. "What?"

Even Rinoa's face was deadly serious and there was not a hint of a smile in Laguna's expression as he beckoned her over to the window.

She stood and stared, unable to say a word. The room overlooked the entrance to the building where a large crowd of very unhappy looking people were gathered.

"Because… of me?" She guessed, incredulously.

Laguna saw her start to tremble and pushed a chair behind her quickly. She sat heavily.

"I told you it would come to this. I told you that something like this would happen. Do you want to get SeeD involved? I could call a squad of them over here." Squall asked seriously.

Kiros rolled his eyes. "Lets not blow things out of proportion."

Arian remembered what Squall had said to her before, about the importance of stability in Esthar and the grave consequences of any dispute here.

"It's alright. I'll leave. It's a nice, easy solution and no one will get hurt. There won't be any fighting over me. I won't permit it." Arian tried to stand but Laguna's hands were on her shoulders, pushing her down into the chair.

"You're not leaving. Don't be silly. There won't _be_ any fighting over this. I promise you that."

"No. I won't chance it. I have to go." She said vehemently.

"Fine." Laguna sighed and removed his hands. Birds in cages can't sing. "If you want to leave, then leave. I won't _make_ you stay. But you promised me that you would."

She struggled with that for a while, but stood anyway.

"Do I mean so little you'd happily chuck this in the first time there's a problem?" He asked quietly and she twisted her head to look at him, agonised.

"That's not fair! You know that's not how it is!"

"Prove it." Laguna said simply.

Arian sank slowly back into the chair, defeated. "No bloodshed. I won't have it on my conscience."

"There won't be, I'm sure." Kiros put in. "Most of those down there are reasonable people. It's just unfortunate that they've heard about you from somewhere else and now they're angry. People don't think straight when they're angry. They don't know _enough_ to be anything other than angry, that's the problem. Talking them around is the best idea." Kiros looked pointedly at Arian. "I should warn you that someone has done their homework and they know enough about you to make this very difficult."

"Oh, we'll soon see about that." She chuckled darkly. "They don't know enough to make those kind of judgements on me. They don't have the right."

"But they _do_ have the right to ask. They have the right to know who you are." Squall pointed out.

"Do you think it'd help if we got married or something?" Laguna said, unexpectedly. 

"No!" Arian and Squall both answered instantly. Squall stared at her for a moment, not anticipating her answer would be the same as his.

"Get that idea out of your head now. I'm not your wife and I will not compete."

Laguna looked puzzled for a moment, then nodded, seeing what she meant.

"I've sent people out to ascertain just what they want. Other than baying for Arian's blood, they want to know _why_. Why is she here, and so on. They don't seem to feel that she _should _be here. You know how a mob thinks, act now, ask questions later." Kiros looked thoughtfully at Laguna. "I think you should go and talk to them."

"What?!?"

"You're the damned president, not me." Kiros retorted.

"Ah, no. I don't think this is such a good idea. I'm _not_ a good speechmaker. Let's think of something else." Laguna laughed nervously.

"Stop being such a – " Squall stopped on seeing the don't-you-dare expression on Rinoa's face. "Look, we all know you like the sound of your own voice. And what about that "Love, friendship and courage" nonsense? I'm _sure_ you can think of something." He waved at the door, impatiently.

"C'mon, Laguna. Don't expect everyone else to clear up the mess _you've_ made." 

Laguna looked at Arian, amazed. "The mess _I've_ made? I rather think that someone else whose name escapes me right now, might _just_ be involved too."

"Nope. _You_ started this. Not me." She said, triumphant at finally winning an argument that day.

"Yeah, but _you_ were the one who showed up after twenty years." 

"I'm sorry, _who_ was the person who just _couldn't_ stay away from the girl on the street and just simply _had_ to hear her entire life story?" She finished the quarrel, shepherding him out of the door. 

***************

They all stood crowded in front of the main entrance. 

"Any idea what you're going to do yet?" Rinoa asked Laguna.

He shook his head miserably. They hadn't relented about the speech idea. Not even when they had to stop and wait for the leg cramp to subside.

"You'll think of something. You'll have to if you want me to stick around here." Arian said brightly.

"_That's_ an _incentive?_" Squall asked incredulously.

"Apparently so." Kiros nodded.

"Yeah, great. Thanks a whole lot. You just pile on the pressure. Anything else you'd like to tell me? Just to make the day complete? A sarcastic comment, perhaps?" Laguna was asking Arian, sourly.

"Well, I can't think of a comment right now, but I suppose I should inform you that I'm going out there with you."

He gave a short humourless laugh. "I don't think so."

"Don't you dare argue with me about this. _Someone_ has to be out there to stop you from saying anything moronic." She frowned at him. 

"Not you. They'll probably rip you to pieces!" 

Arian gave him a flat look. "This is a civilised country. Things like that don't happen. Apart from which, I can take care of myself, thank you."

Laguna pulled her hand up from her side. "With wrists like this?"

Snatching her hand away, she scowled. "When you've _quite_ finished criticising. There's more than one way to skin a cat. I wasn't talking about violence. I managed to take care of myself pretty well." She saw the sceptical looks from the rest. "I lived on the streets, more or less. Remember?"

"But you weren't _brought up_ on the streets." Kiros put in. 

"Like it makes a difference." Arian muttered. "I can still manage to take care of myself and I'm going out there, regardless." She shoved Laguna through the doorway, then followed.

Laguna walked hesitantly up to the crowd, who had quietened down curiously, and looked back to where Arian was a couple of steps behind him. She rolled her eyes and watched as he turned back to the crowd. 

"Um. Hi." He started, still clueless about what he was going to say. "This is Arian." He waved his hands vaguely in her direction and she sighed as the crowd started yelling again. Laguna winced at the yells. Arian watched as he tried to speak, unable to be heard over the noise. She stepped forwards to speak to him. "Go back inside."

"What?" He asked, confused. "A minute ago you were bullying me into coming out here and making some kind of speech, now you think we should go back inside?"

"No. I think _you_ should go back inside."

"If you think I'm leaving alone out here with –"

"Laguna. I mean it. Go inside. You've proved that you're bloody useless when it comes to talking to a rabble, so let me try." He looked at the determined look on her face and walked reluctantly back, stopping to look around once or twice.

Arian rolled her eyes again, then turned to face the crowd.

***************

"What _is_ she doing?" Kiros asked anxiously, as Laguna returned. 

"I don't know." He said, puzzled. They watched through the doorway as Arian simply stood for a while, not doing anything. Then she sat down on the floor, not in surrender but looking completely self-assured. She studied the floor for a while, waiting as the crowd grew quieter, leaning curiously over each other to see what she was doing.

"I wonder if that's deliberate or unintentional on her part." Squall mused, considering the possibility that he might have to reassess his opinion of Arian's intelligence.

"What do you mean?" Rinoa asked.

"Do you think they'd harm her while she's like that? Sat down, I mean?"

"I don't see what difference that makes." Rinoa shook her head. "I still don't understand."

Squall sighed. "That's because you've spent all your time fighting with SeeD's who are trained to fight, no matter what the circumstances. These are just normal people. I don't think they'd raise a hand against her while she's so prone."

He turned his attention back outside.

Arian looked up from the floor finally and decided that this wasn't such a bright idea, after all. There were a lot of faces looking expectantly at her, waiting. "Why?" She asked quietly, so that they all had to strain to hear her. "Why are you so unhappy with me? Is it my past? If it is, then you don't know much about it. You obviously all know that I worked the streets, for want of a better word for it. But it _is_ the past, that's all. And I had reasons." She paused, but still there was silence, the rabble strangely hushed, waiting to see what she'd say next.

"None of you knew me then." She frowned to herself. "None of you know me now, either, but maybe you'll be able to. Anyway, the point is that the only person who knows me well from back then is Laguna. If he can put up with me now, then I'm sure you lot can too." 

Back inside, Kiros winced at that remark. "She's going to be squashed like a bug if she keeps making comments like that. She'll lose the tenuous hold she's got on them." 

Laguna glanced back at him for a moment. "I'll go back out and get her."

"No. Let's give her a chance. Maybe she'll be able to swing this around." Squall said, to the amazement of the others. "I still don't like her, but let's get this situation over with." He frowned, seeing their expressions.

"I really don't know what else you want to hear from me…" Arian trailed off, beginning to lose ideas. "I could tell you about a girl who threw a coin back at a soldier, who then grew so curious that he returned to talk to her. I could tell you anything you asked me to, but I don't know why it would be important to you. _I'm_ not the president. But the president you have wants me to stay here. He made me promise to." She took a deep breath.

"You could always get rid of _him_ if you are _that_ opposed to me, but you once saw something there that you liked so much that you badgered him into being president. And because you needed him, he stayed. He gave up all he had, unknowingly perhaps, because of this place. He's the same as he was then, my presence doesn't change that." Arian paused, deciding to chance changing her tone with them. The faces around her were thoughtful now. She had given them something to think about. "You're all reasonable people. This is Esthar. You're almost renowned for being civilized here. Live up to that and let me stay. If only because Laguna wants me to. After what he's done for Esthar, you can let him have that much, can't you? Because, you see, in the end I don't matter. I'm not important here at all. But he is and for some reason you seem to want him to stick around." She watched the faces for a while, and then stood up and walked slowly away. 

It had been so hard to think of something to say to them that wasn't angry. She was _very_ angry at them inside, for thinking that _she_ would somehow make a fundamental change that would affect them.

Behind her, the crowd muttered amongst themselves and when she reached the door, Arian looked back. "Go back to your homes or whatever. There's no reason for you to be here." She said gently, but loud enough to be heard.

Laguna pulled her quickly through the doorway, almost as if he were afraid the crowd would suddenly change their minds and lunge at Arian after all.

"Ow! I think you pulled my arm out of its socket." She complained, rubbing her arm. "And I think that thanks are in order." She waited expectantly.

"We don't know if your little talk has worked yet." Kiros pointed out, but Rinoa nodded from where she was stood looking out of the door.

"It has. They've mostly dispersed. A couple of them are still milling around out there but they don't look very sure of themselves."

"Well?" Arian looked pointedly at Laguna, who shrugged.

"Why exactly should _I_ be thanking you? You're the one who this trouble was about."

"If you remember, we've already had this argument once and I won." She said impatiently.

"Alright." Laguna gave in. "Thanks."

Arian exchanged an unimpressed look with Rinoa. "Do you ever get this problem with Squall?"

"Actually, it's all I can do to get Squall to answer me. Most of the time I'm just thankful that he's spoken at all. If he says something that's nice, then that's a bonus." The girl giggled.

Arian nodded sympathetically and turned back to Laguna. "You. Come with me."

"What have I done now? Where are we going?" 

Kiros chuckled at the worried look on his friends face and shook his head, trying to stop the laughter.

"We are going somewhere where I can scream at you in private."

"What did I do wrong?" Laguna shrugged, still baffled.

She walked forwards until he was forced to start backing away. "Where do you want me to start? First, there's the "Um, hi, this is Arian" bit. Is that _really_ the best you could do? Then there's the making _me_ speak to that lot out there bit. Have you got any idea how _petrified_ I was?" 

"Hey, wait a minute, you did that by yourself! It was your idea!" 

"But I wouldn't have had to if you'd actually said something intelligent." She continued, angry to have been interrupted.

"I was thinking! Besides, you didn't _look_ petrified." He added.

"Unfortunately we didn't have time for you to finish thinking. We could have been there all day waiting for that. And I _was_ petrified." Arian bit her tongue, about to add the usual "So there." onto the end of the sentence but too angry to reduced this to simple bickering.

"Finally, having failed miserably to sort out the mess you've made and me having to do that for you, I think you can come up with something a bit more convincing than "Thanks"." She finished, raising an eyebrow and motioning him down the corridor.

"You know, I could almost get to like her, sometimes." Squall remarked with a vicious grin. 

"Don't be mean, Squall." Rinoa said absently. 

Kiros looked up at Ward, still trying to stop laughing. "What were we saying before about her being passive?"

He laughed again at Ward's reply. "Yeah. I think you're right. Six of one, half a dozen the other."

***************

It was a couple of days later when Kiros saw Arian storming down the corridor towards him, searching for something.

"What's the problem?" The man asked, amused to see her so upset.

"I woke up and he wasn't there." She announced, like it was a hanging offence.

"That's some kind of problem, is it?"

Arian glanced sourly at him. "Let's call it one of my adorable little foibles, shall we? It's a notion. _He_ knows what I mean! Where is he?"

"He's gone to Winhill." Kiros watched the sudden change in her whole demeanour with interest. "I expect he'll be back sometime soon, but Rinoa and Squall are heading back to Garden in a moment, so they could probably give you a lift over there if you want to –"

"No." She said quietly. "I'll just go and wait someplace 'til he gets back."

***************

By late evening she guessed that Laguna must have returned by now and peered curiously into his room. He was stood motionless outside on the balcony, arms folded across the balustrade, head resting in his arms. Not really wanting to disturb him, she turned hesitantly to leave.

"Hey." She heard him greet her, quietly, without moving.

"I was just going." She apologised.

"There's no need. You can stay, if you want."

Arian nodded at that, and made her way out besides him. She was silent for a long while, just watching, then she reached down and stroked his hair.

"How was Winhill?" She asked softly.

"The same as it always is. The same as it always will be. Winhill never changes." Laguna continued to lean on his arms, eyes closed.

She nodded thoughtfully at his answer and looked up at the dark sky.

"I dreamed about her last night, you know. That's why I went there today. Just to… I don't know." At that, her hand froze in its movement across his hair.

"You don't need to give me a reason for it." She said, a little angry, then her face softened again and she smiled fondly. "And I know you dreamed of her. You talk in your sleep."

He looked up at her suddenly, in surprise. "I do? What did I say?"

"You don't really _talk_. Not enough to make out any words but her name. You only say her name coherently. Don't worry about it." Arian smiled, slightly amused at his reaction.

"But I _am_ worrying about it! I shouldn't… It's not fair on you."

"Shush." She frowned slightly, not happy with what he had said. "_I'll_ decide what's fair on me and what's not. And I would be far less happy if it was _my_ name you say in your sleep. It _should be_ hers."

Laguna opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it and they stood in silence for a while. "I dreamed… that she was here. And it was like she had always been here. It was so real, so… vivid. I thought perhaps that…" His voice trailed off. "And then I woke up and there was only…" He stopped, realising what he had been about to say. 

"Only me." She finished for him, a half-smile twisting her lips.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Then perhaps you should." Arian answered thoughtfully. 

Unable to fathom her meaning, Laguna's head sank back to his arms and he shut his eyes again. "I know you know what I mean. I know _you_ understand _me_, but I don't think I will ever understand you. You say peculiar things sometimes. I can't understand what it's like to be you, even if you can understand me."

When she didn't say anything, his green eyes opened and looked up at her, childlike. "I miss her. It still hurts."

"It will always hurt." She whispered gravely. 

Lifting his head, he frowned a little. "They told me, back then, that it'd fade in time. That it'd get better and one day I'd be able to think about her again without feeling like this. But they were wrong, weren't they?"

"Yes. It never goes away. It never gets better. And it never will. I know that very well indeed." She gave a wistful smile. "In fact, it gets harder rather than easier, I think." She forced her expression to brighten. "Let's talk about something else."

"Don't try and cheer me up. I don't feel like being cheerful." He sighed and lay his head back down. 

"No. You are not going to start feeling sorry for yourself. That's why I'm here. When I get depressed, you cheer me up and when your optimism fades, then I have to try and bring it back." She watched a small smile cross his face and sighed, satisfied. Seeing someone on one of the walkways below, she leaned over the balustrade and waved.

"They waved back!" Arian exclaimed. "They've already forgotten that they didn't like me!"

Laguna laughed at her surprise. "They're all reasonable people. Things just got blown up out of proportion. Most of them probably didn't even know why they were there."

"So is this it then? No more problems? Everything fine from here on? The end?" She tilted her head on one side.

"No more problems, I hope. But not the end. Nothing really ends."

"Was that _philosophy_ I heard there?!" Arian said, feigning shock.

"Ah, shaddup." He grinned, then shot her a puzzled look. "Kiros said something about notions. What was that about?"

"You've forgotten? Your memory's like a sieve, you know that?" Arian sighed. "Once before, we had a long conversation about what notions and I said that I wanted someone there when I woke up. Remember yet?"

"Yeah. I remember now." 

She turned and grinned at him. "You said you didn't love me, back then." She teased.

"Well, I didn't. Not then."

She smiled and lifted her head to catch the moonlight, letting the silver glow dance on her face. 

"I thought you didn't like the moonlight." he asked, amused. "You said it was for people in fairytales. People whose dreams weren't shattered."

"I didn't like it. Not then. But I do now."

Author's note: I would like to point out that this fic is Ryns fault because when I told her that I didn't have any more fic ideas concerning Laguna, she said "Blah, blah blah, I bet you'll think of something else, sooner or later.". Consequently, I started thinking "Well, what _could_ I write…" and this happened.

And just for the record, I _don't_ hate Squall. He's just so serious that he's fun to pick on!


End file.
